Thanks for your support K and Lan.
I took the weekend to reflect on what W and I discussed on Friday night. I also read the section in the DR book related to passion meltdown.....which is what my W is going through. I had never read this section because I / we never had this problem. Without getting into specifics, the sexual part of our relationship has always been a BIG (no pun intended) of our relationship. When I think about our LLs, I know my W likes the words, I like the physical part and the way I show my love is with acts of service. When the physical part slows down significantly and with what I have gone through, I can't help but wonder if this is viable long term. Compared to what I have read, the OM thing does not really bother me. If our sex life was back to normal OM would not even cross my mind. Like Lanzo says, I am in rehab and I need to continue to work at it. Maybe I expected results quicker or an effort from the other party that would show me her committment. Little things are important to me....offering a cup of coffee when she gets one for herself .... fixing a plate of food during a party....getting a drink.....nothing major.
Last night we were at a little party at one of her new friend's homes and our D7 was baby sat. She had a hell of a time and I don't think she purposely neglected me....but i am a big boy and mingled ok. When we got home she made it perfectly clear that there would be no sex because she needed to get up early. Now what gets me is she could have decided to leave the party a half hour early.....there is the root of the problem....right now I feel like i am very low on the totem pole.
I also spent time reading the thread for newcomers to piecing and now realize that what I / we are going through is "normal".
In conclusion, my "strategy" for the next couple of weeks is to not pressure W at all regarding sex (this will be very difficult). Also, I will need to get back to GALing and acting as if. Like the book says, if things are not working, make some changes. I will keep you posted on developments.