Thank you Ali, but one point to add, this doesn't hurt as much as you might think.
Poet, your husband is in a downward cycle, hes miserable, stressed out, panicking, angry, his whole world is a mess and hes' added an OW to just make this that much worse.
You pusuing him is you jumping into that nightare too. Just step OUT of it by detaching. My wife created a miserable world for hserlf too, and dragged me into it with her OM. Once I got OUT of that world and started creating one for MYSELF that was HEALTHY I felt a LOT better.
This shoudlnt HURT it will actually feel BETTER. Right now you are in pain, but if you just step OUT Of this ridiculous drama your H is creating you will be much better off...his channel is miserable and painful, change the channel and let him be miserable.
Spouses OFTEN DO come around when you tune them out and find something better to do with your time. Mine is coming around and others have too.
Just refuse to be part of the sick little world they have created for themselves...he is dragging you into it, just dont fight with him, don't argue, dont answer HIS QUESTTIONS IEHTER...when he watns to know where you have been tell him "doing lots of exciting heealthy things for myself" and leave it there.
When i started doing stuff outside my home and ans't around my WIFE got REAL NOSY and WORRIED.
You just have to tune these children out and change the channel for yourself to something more enjoyable.
Do it, it wont hurt, trust me, it hurts a lot worse watching and living his drama.
