Hey, Beth, it sounds like we do have lots in common! My main point would be that like DR seems to recommend we should just focus on what we can control. I do allow & encourage my H to be with the kids whenever he wants, and call them each day, etc. But when he doesn't do that, I don't stress over it. Because of my childhood experiences, I believe that my kids will be ok. Yeah, I do think my S14 has some anger with H, and we have him see a therapist and I have a good relationship with him. I know that 2 loving, involved parents would be ideal of course, but if you don't have that for whatever reason, a parent dying or just in my case, maybe self-involved or whatever, that we shouldn't spend our time stressing about the missing or less-involved parent, but just focus on ourselves being the best parent we can be since that's all we can really control. Karen
