I'm back after a long absence

[123snap]

My husband and I have remained together. It isn't the easiest process, it has taken a lot of patience on my part. A lot of patience. He says he wants to work things out and generally I believe him, but lately he has been depressed again, withdrawn, non-communicative, that sort of thing. I asked him directly if there was anything I should know and he said no, I asked if he just wanted space and he said yes, so that is what I am trying to do.

I came out a month or so ago that he had an affair, that it is over, and that he choose to stay in the marriage. I feel like I am always apologizing for being too talkative, or close to him or having him think I am putting pressure on him, however some days geesh who should be the one apologizing and bending over backwards for the other. I am feeling angry right now and that is not helping my patience, focusing on me, or just general up attitude. I was doing pretty well thinking about the future and what direction I want to move in and letting the past go, but with him depressed again it is making it very hard.

mostly I needed a place to vent these feelings, it helps me to write them out.

I know I am lucky that he is trying, I just wish he would go faster, try harder or get over this current bout of depression. He is seeing a therapist, and so am I, we probably need to do some couples counseling again, but he has seemed wishy washy on that idea.

tired of feeling sad and on edge

J