Well I guess I would just feel a lot better if I knew that he wanted to work on things instead of being cryptic and only saying that he needs to fix himself. In a way I feel as though my life is on hold (in terms of where we live--which is not where I want to live, in terms of not even being on the continent where I want to be). I know that I can do the best with what I have, but I need somehow to hear that he feels this is worth putting effort into. If I knew 100% that in his heart it was hopeless, I think I would be making some different decisions. I hope this doesn't sound codependent, but as long as there is a chance for the marriage, I am certainly not going to try and get a transfer back to the US--the M is definitely worth the time and effort of being here. However I have friends and family back in the US, and if this weren't going to work out here, I would want to start rebuilding again with them around...Not sure if this is the right way to look at things.
I guess I'm just so used to having timelines, that without a definitive one in this case, I don't know how long it will be OK for me to try and work on this. I'll be back in mid-October, and part of me wants to just waltz back into the house and say let's pick up where we left off. A part of me is thinking that as soon as I come back, he'll want another 3 months (he's already suggested this might be the case), and I don't know if I can go through this yet again...
Ugh ITH
Me:34 H:36 M:5 years T: 8 years Bomb: 07/17/08 I want to be separated for 6 months--I don't know what I want the outcome to be S 07/28/08-11/08/08 Living together ~7 months D Possibly busted?!?!!!
