I guess I would definitely qualify as an old-timer. I first came to the board in June, 2003, desperately seeking info that might help me to save my m. I was careful to only read posts that were positive, or success stories, because I wanted to believe that H would be back. Found a few stories of returning MLC'ers, but not many. I haven't posted for about 3-4 years, but occasionally do some lurking.
Warning: Anyone looking for a story about H returning, I would advise you to stop reading this.
My story is almost the same as many of the others who were posting around the time I was on the boards.
Ex-H left in 2002 for another woman, although I didn't know she existed at the time. He even swore "on the kids" that he never cheated. He did the waffling back and forth, saying he's not right in the head, someday he'd be back, and so on and so on.
He filed for divorce without telling me, so I also had the surprise in the mail.
He postponed the D, and even after it was finalized in 12/04, he sent me a card saying that maybe he'd be back in a few years.

Ex-H is still with the OW, after 7 years. Fortunately, I live a days drive away from the Ex, so I only see him occasionally when he comes to visit the kids. He is not a pretty sight to behold.
He has gained 50-75 lbs, lost most of his hair, and what is left is gray. His mind is still in the gutter. And he is still an a$$ - a liar and a cheat.

Fortunately, I've never had to lay eyes on OW, but I hear she is uglier than sin, and extremely controlling. My son hates her and refuses to have anything to do with her, but the Ex still pulls his tricks, like not warning son ahead of time when OW will be there. The first time my kids met her, it was at a surprise birthday party for the OW. Ex neglected to tell the kids this, so the surprise was on them. Not a happy moment for them. But that's another story.

I am doing fine on my own. I have 3 teenagers - one in college, 2 in high school. They are beautiful kids and doing well in their lives. Ex sees them a few times a year. His OW won't let him spend too much time away from her. She monitors his emails, so our contact is very limited - mostly about money - but that is ok.
I haven't dated yet. The longer I go without dating, the less interested I am in finding someone. Between work and driving the kids around, I don't have a lot of extra time. And I wouldn't know how to go about it, anyway.

So my story will not give you hope of your spouse returning, but my life is good - and yours will be too.