tl:dr = "too long; didn't read.
FRATS = "F*** Reading All That Sh**
\:\)

Other lines in the same vein that didn't work:

  • "You're my sex panda; I'm gonna feed you the hard bamboo."
  • "You're a sex octopus; I'm gonna chase you around until you squirt."
  • "You're a sex Pottery Barn; I'm gonna break something so I can take you home with me!"


Those are the smooth ones; the rest were pretty tasteless. \:D

Recovering Sex-Starved Husband.