I don"t think I will be sneaking out anymore or be in the piecing thread too much longer. I should be joining the seperated thread soon..... As you read on Tostada's thread, I am not sure of the long term viability of our relationship. There are signs when things are not going in the right direction. This past year has helped me be more vigilant and open my eyes. There are obviously many things that happen in our respective sitches that we do not go into or our posts would be too long (I have a hunch this one will be). Like I said earlier, I am not perfect. We all have our strengths and weaknesses. When we decided to get back and give this a shot, I was 100% committted. I expected the same from my W. I am not getting that. Therefore last night, I decided that I had enough. Simply put, I told my W that my idea of a relationship is not what I have been living recently. I feel like I am doing all the work and she is just surfing along. She admitted that I was right to feel this way because although she loves me and thinks I am a very nice guy, her heart is not going boom boom. I point blank asked her where all this was going and she could not answer. Right now after a very deep 5 hours of sleep, I feel like leaving. I don't know if this is part of the piecing process. In some ways my piecing sitch resembles Lanzo's. I am just not prepared to invest all this effort if my ROI will we zero. Life is too short....I would rather live alone than live with someone else and feel alone. I am not asking for much...just that I be top two or three in my partner's life....at this moment I feel that I am even behind the cat. They are calling for a lousy weekend weather wise which will only compound my frustration I am afraid. We left off last night with let's see where this goes....this time around, I have much more resolve and will not let this linger. This does not smell good right now.
