I sometimes wonder now, if I hadn't gotten distracted at the exact time that XH was snapping out of his delerium, if we wouldn't still be together. And if we were, if it would be a good thing?

I was reading some old posts and seeing that XH was wanting to come home after moving out, living in a hotel, living with OW, moving home because his lease was up...how would things be different and would it be better or worse? I don't know, but I remember wishing I would have a crystal ball so I could see how it would all turn out. I sometimes think things happen the way they do for a reason.

If he wants to come home, will you be there? How will things be different this time? Does he have the patience to wait for you to be secure with him again? Do you have the strength to get through the uncertainty? What if, in the long run, your waiting another few weeks was what you needed to make it to the other side? What if you can look back, 20 years from now and know that you waited long enough to make the difference?

What if I'm Full of Shitake mushrooms?

I'm not an expert, but I've been there. And I survived.