LWB - thanks for your honesty. I too probably am guilty of judging others.
Regarding how to answer the question, I think going forward I am simply going to say "she went through MLC." I recently did have someone ask if there was infidelity involved. I just nodded my head and then told that person that in the overwhelming majority of divorces there are affairs involved. When someone asks about MLC, I then go into that discussion.
None of this is fun, but I am visiting a friend this weekend where there will be beer, boating and sun - a formula that usually equates to a great time.
Me: 48 Ex-W: 45 M: Nov '96, together since Oct 93 Bomb: on 10-yr anni - Nov '06 OM Separated: mid-Feb '07 Divorced mid-July '08 One daughter - 28 XW living w/OM