We live in a society that is all for disposables, that includes marriages when things get a little tough. So it is the easy way out!!(If you believe it is easy) Soon enough the will wonder what the heck they did, but for now they want the nearest exit.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
We live in a society that is all for disposables, that includes marriages when things get a little tough. So it is the easy way out!!(If you believe it is easy) Soon enough the will wonder what the heck they did, but for now they want the nearest exit. kat
WOW Kat, you said it. That was a perfect description of this BS.
(((H4H))) thanks for the sweet, if not a bit twisted post...I did smile so you win (for now!)
Sounds like you are Mr. Popularity these days. Have a good time this weekend, but keep a wary eye out for B...weak zebra that you are, she is biding her time.
About GBG, shes so confused. Have you given anymore thought to suggesting Retro?
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
I was laying in bed watching tv with D11 when roomie and D6 got home. D's go off. I stay in bed watching tv. Roomie comes in the bedroom, grabs a box, goes into the bathroom and starts to pack her sh*t. Door wide open. I'm watching tv getting more and more pi**ed. She's just going about her business.
I finally get up. I WAS going to shower and get to bed. I go get D's to bed. I'm getting upset with them, because they are not listening.
It's not them, its me. I'm really upset.
Kisses goodnight.
I start to tidy up the kitchen. Start on dishes. Roomie throws a load of wash in the washer. She say, "I'll do those." "Don't worry about it!" I quietly snap back. When I finish, she is now in the bedroom cleaning out some of her drawers.
This bitch can't wait until tomorrow?
I grab some boxers, squeeze past her and take a shower. I come out and she is still there. I turn off the tv, take the pillows off the bed and pull down the comforter. "Your going to bed?" she asks rather nicely. "Yup." I say defiantly. I get into bed and get under the covers. Lights blaring. I close my eyes. She continues for a couple of more minutes and then is up and turns out the lights.
She give me a quiet "Goodnight". She can go to hell. I'm not answering her. She's off to the living room.
This woman has ice in her veins.
I have been laying in bed crying for the past 20 minutes. I mean sobbing, but I refuse to let her hear me.
So I'm quiet. She is getting ready to watch a movie and her phone rings. S14 is ready to be picked up. She leaves and I gather myself.
And here I am. I was fighting back tears when I started to write. I'm better already. I'm not sure what tomorrow is going to bring. I don't even want to come back home tomorrow. I can just imagine what it is going to look like.
I think about you guys out there. All of you. I can't remember who doesn't have their spouse still at home. Okay, Lost does. I can't think of anyone else. kat, karen, jeff, sarah, suga..H4U is trying to work things out, still. lodo, nocodes, cbk...
I really thought that I was going to be different. My sitch. My wife was still at home. Still in the same bed.
But it's not different. It's the same as everyone elses. The same boat. I don't have much hope right now. The sadness is coming back.
Fighting it, but not very well.
Please God. Please give me strength. Please.
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
((((H4H)))) watching H pack was one of the hardest things that I have ever had to witness. It took a while for it to really be ok, but it gets better. I promise it does.
You won't have to wonder what its going to be like when you get home. Is she gonna be nice, is she not. etc...
Just like I posted to Buster, dude...this is her journey and shes going to have to make it her way. If you could fix this, it would already be fixed, but since its not about you, you can't. The best you can do now is pray for her and stand back and let her fall or fly. Either way, she will have to learn the lessons that are hers to learn. Use this time to work on you and have some positives in YOUR life.
You are way too cool a guy to let this hold you down. If you don't believe me, then why is your dance card so full?
Take care of you, keep being a great dad and find the guy you want to be. Be the guy she was/is a fool to let go.
Truth be told, I'm almost glad that H didn't come back when he said he would (right before the Troll announced the "good news"). It only would have meant that he would have had to put us through leaving again. He wasn't/isn't ready to not be sick, so I just figure God is looking out for us and there is a bigger plan...I just don't have the specs yet.
In the immortal word of Axl Rose....
Said woman take it slow, and things will be just fine. All we need is just use a little patience....
Hang in there. ((((S&M hug)))) GOTCHA!!!!
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
Thinking about you today. Just wanted to check in from the road, as I sit in a grocery store parking lot, poaching a nearby free Wi-Fi signal, to let you know that.
God will see you and your family through this, if you let Him.
Im so sorry, my H is still with me, and I can't imagine watching something like that go on. Its completely so sad. I can feel your grief in your post and my heart goes out to you.
Its so hard to understand that someone you've loved an shared your life with can be so heartless and mean.
This is not your doing, this is the fate she has decided in her head that is right for her, even if it hurts everyone else in the process.
You have many friends and people who love you. Lean on that, surround yourself with people who CARE. Fill your heart with your children, and go on. She can't be saved, she's lost.
Thinking of you~
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
Hugs Roger. I am so sorry that you are having to go through this. I didn't see H pack. I think he just grabbed some essentials and then was gone. He would come home and snuggle up with me in bed on the weekends and it just made me mad. One day I said if you are moving, here is a box...fill'er up!!
She will feel what she has done. Right now she has just shut herself down so she won't feel the pain. I think they all do that. We are here for you and you have loads of friends willing to help you.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
Puppy, you being on vacation, that means a hell of a lot to me. Go enjoy and get off the damn computer. For your wife, that would be your 180, huh?
I would put a smiley at the end, but don't much feel like a smile.
Suga, thank you for the words. Pray I will. She's told me that I had become more of a father/brother figure to her. I need to let that bird fly. Her life is in her own two hands now. I pray for her.
Thank you tal. I forgot about you. Sorry.
kat, thanks as usual.
I'm actually better than I was last night. My best friend already called to check in on me. The day is going to be hard. I've had a lump in my throat all morning that is just dying to jump out of me. While talking to him, I could feel it coming, but I managed to stuff it back down. He asked how I was, I told him that I was just sad. He told me, 'Thats just reality setting in.' Great guy. Single dad. He knew GBG first when she used to work at the local daycare years ago. He had his daughter there. Been a great family friend since. Now he is only my friend. Another one she pushed away.
I've been at work over an hour already. I've read your posts. Just hard to reply. That lump in my throat is killing me.
My boss has already offered to buy me lunch today. I can't recall if I told her about today, though. Thats funny. I told her that I was going to be in a weird mood today. She felt so bad for me, but she encourages me.
This morning, I'M the one that slept through the alarm. I am being nudged by roomie. "Do you have to go in early?" she asks. I am looking at her like, "Where the hell am I?"
The alarm had been going off for about 30 minutes. I must have been exhausted. I am up and getting ready. Rushing. Ironing my clothes. She stays up and starts in on her drawers again already. I get ready and kiss my girls goodbye while they are sleeping.
Roomie made coffee already. I make my cup and walk over to the bedroom.
This time I look her in the eye. Our eyes meet.
"Goodbye" and I give a wave of my hand. "Goodbye" looking back at me.
Last edited by hopeful4her; 08/01/0803:25 PM.
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
H4H, so sorry you are going through this! I know it's hard to believe but really when my H moved out, things actually got better for me. Less stress, less headaches, just a feeling of peace and serenity that I hadn't had for a while living with him. They are emotionally checked out already, and it was a relief for me not to have to face that every day. You deserve to have a wife that loves you, is nice, and all that!!! You're a funny, wonderful, loving person and you deserve the same in your life!!! ((((H4H))) Karen
