I think that I am going to save your list of "hardest to forgive" to my journal on my hard drive. You organized and articulated my thoughts and feelings quite cleanly.
One minor difference for me is that the whole mess my H put us through has plunged me into clinical depression. This has added an additional anchor around my neck.
Tbone said something about the "anger phase". I'm glad to hear him use the word "phase" because I was beginning to think that I might never be free of it. It took me a long time to enter this phase, but now that I'm here, I really feel entrenched.
I agree with your point of view in regard to forgiveness. You are wise in not verbally announcing something like that until you are ready, but work daily toward that until then. Perhaps as you get to the parts of your list that you know you can move forward on, you can specifically give forgiveness to her rather than trying to accomplish it all at once. So in essence you are working on the whole list at once, but verbalizing only those points that you have resolved for yourself. I'm being redundant, huh.
