This little thread has contained some oh so important points that need to be read again and again.
I'm on my way to D, about a year after I found this site. Of course I feel a sense of loss, but to make a long story short I feel the best years of my life are ahead of me. The key, as you say, is to work on yourself. It's hard, and painful at times, when you begin to honestly see and work on your own shortcomings and issues from childhood, but I have also experienced a wonderful feeling of liberation and possibility of a better future. It really is summed up in many ways in the shift from "unconscious" to "conscious." Be conscious of yourself, your wounds from childhood and earlier in life, and how they affect you. Be conscious of how others have been wounded, and what really makes them tick inside. Try to change what you want to change about yourself. Be conscious about what you want and need from a relationship. The road ahead is not all roses, of course, but we can come through the fire of a trial like this much healthier people in many respects if we take that leap instead of retreating into simply blaming our spouses or simply waiting and acting as if we are doing something.
IMP, your direct posts on some of my threads last fall really helped, and I have benefited greatly from reading some of your other posts here. So, thank you! It's almost time for fantasy football again!
