Notice at the top of the article there is an email address for requesting a referral to a therapist in your area. In my case, I simply lucked out, but if I was doing it all over again, here's what I'd ask or cover on the phone after compiling a list of names from the phone book:
1. Where were you educated? 2. What degrees do you have? 3. Can you tell me what licensures you have obtained? 4. Are you licensures current in this state? 5. What are your areas of specialty? (Look for marriage and family counseling, affair recovery, your issues, etc.) 6. What is your theoretical perspective on therapy? (Look for SBT, if they don't mention it ask specifically). 7. How many sessions does a typical couple recovering from an affair spend with you before terminating counseling? 8. How long is each session? 9. How much does each session cost? 10. Will insurance pay for the couples sessions? (Beware if they answer yes for couples therapy - it could be an indicator that they engage in insurance fraud - more on that if you're interested). 11. How much advance notice do you require for cancellation of a session? 12. Do you have any homework I can do to prepare for my first session? (This can be an indicator of their experience with SBT, especially if it involves goal-setting exercises). 13. Can I start marital counseling without the active participation of my W, who isn't as sure as I am about committing to this R?
That's just a preliminary list. Others may have some good questions to contribute as well. Make sure you really grill your potential therapists over the phone before walking in the door for your first appointment. MC can be expensive, and your time is even more costly, so don't waste it on someone who isn't going to meet your needs ASAP (i.e., on the first appointment). Try to avoid seeing counselors who subscribe to the "peeling the onion skin" type of psychotherapy that can take years of work. Make sure you communicate your need for immediate solutions to your problems.
