After I last wrote, I've been feeling pretty good.
Pretty much I've been feeling lately is this "I love H, but I don't think I can commit my life to him."
It has been a big relief to me. H has done nothing to help himself while I continue to work on myself. I realized certain things that I need that H hasn't supplied me. Basically, I realized that I deserve to be treated better and I've found I've been letting go.
People want me to hate H. But I don't. I love him so much and I've allowed myself to embrace that, but at the same time, let him go. I'm sorta OK in this limbo land right now.
H & I, both 32, together since 18. *M 7/03, A since 9/06. Bomb 7/07, H ended it w/ OW 9/08 * Agreed to D 6/09...very hard *D 8/10 * At peace, have become great friends w/ X-H and his new GF
