Pisces...1hope...thanks....i really do believe she is....gotta keep doing it tho....
compliments.......what are some other things that women like to be complimented on? I'm getting this compliment thing...i really am.....(finally...LOL).....
ME:32 WAW:31 D #1: 3.5 D #2: 2 Together: 13 M:6 Bomb Dropped: 2/15/08 Sep legally: 6/18/08
"Tommorrow there'll be sunshine, and all this darkness past..." -Bruce Springsteen Land of Hope and Dreams
I would have watched house with you. Seriously. I don't care if it is weird in her mind, you were going to watch them anyways. I would have deadpanned, why, because you already watched them?
Me 45, H 46, S 23, M 26, Together 30, Bomb 6-2-08, S 6-19-08; H left 12-29-08. H home 12-09, Still MLC in 2012! Me- I have my big girl panties on. Bring it.
compliments.......what are some other things that women like to be complimented on? I'm getting this compliment thing...i really am.....(finally...LOL).....
Good for you... i'd be careful about coming on too strong with the compliments. i think every girl loves a compliment now and then, just don't go overboard
Sometimes (before all the crazy!) my H used to tell me how nice i smelled. If she wears perfume or something like that, you might mention it if you give her a hug or something. I dunno if that's a little weird for where you are at though.
Little things are always good. Also, if you could compliment her on something she does as a mother. I don't know what, but i always appreciate when someone says that i'm a good mother. it means the world to me.
ann
If i can't fall in love... I'd like to fall in chocolate! ~ Author Unknown
Kjo- thanks. it's such a good show...we used to watch it all the time...prior...LOL. and BTW...i'm not that sharp to come up with taht line......
Ann- thanks. I've been thinking (because this is how i need to learn) how to work in a "word of affirmation" about her mothering skills so it doesn't seem forced or awkward....
and i know i shouldn't worry about her so much......it's just nice to see progress made....even if it is just baby steps....
Now if she would compliment me.....that'd be pretty sweet...
ME:32 WAW:31 D #1: 3.5 D #2: 2 Together: 13 M:6 Bomb Dropped: 2/15/08 Sep legally: 6/18/08
"Tommorrow there'll be sunshine, and all this darkness past..." -Bruce Springsteen Land of Hope and Dreams
compliments.......what are some other things that women like to be complimented on? I'm getting this compliment thing...i really am.....(finally...LOL).....
I would go slowly with compliments. We women like them, but she is not into believing that you are "for real" right now. So don't be surprised if she doesn't take them seriously, or if she blows them off.
I have siad things to my H like you smell good, and he has responded "What, I need a shower." Or, you look nice, and he will say "I feel fat."
Play it light and don't take it personally. After one of his responses I will just shrug and say, well you smell good to me, or I think you look nice.
Don't make the compliment with ANY thought of getting something in return. You will only be setting an expectation that will hurt when it doesn't happen.
Make sure that the things you say are true, and not something out of line for your personality.
It's good to compliment actions, something like "I really like how you read to the kids every night" etc. Even tho you are H & W she may find it more comfortable than something personal right now.
You are doing wonderful. Keep taking the small steps.
Most of us are about as happy as we make up our minds to be.
1hope...i know. i don't want to do it all the time..but i would routinely compliment her when we lived together......but dind't make it personalized..i think i get a little somehting about my R. She said she never felt special...could this be something that made her feel unspecial? My unpersonalized compliments?
i think so....anyone agree?
ME:32 WAW:31 D #1: 3.5 D #2: 2 Together: 13 M:6 Bomb Dropped: 2/15/08 Sep legally: 6/18/08
"Tommorrow there'll be sunshine, and all this darkness past..." -Bruce Springsteen Land of Hope and Dreams
but dind't make it personalized..i think i get a little somehting about my R. She said she never felt special...could this be something that made her feel unspecial? My unpersonalized compliments?
i think so....anyone agree?
When all my craziness started, H's compliments turned into "you look fine" and half the time he wouldn't even look at me. Then he stopped all together.
I went from feeling like he cared to thinking that he was lying because he always said the same thing and half the time i had to ask him how i looked.
Noticing little things makes us believe you more. Anyone can say, oh yeah, you look nice. but you really have to be paying special attention to her to notice how pertty her earrings look or that you love that shade of blue on her, etc...
So long as you aren't going overboard and she seems receptive to your compliments, i'd say go for it.
Do what works. ann
If i can't fall in love... I'd like to fall in chocolate! ~ Author Unknown
