A loving mother whose children do not repsect her or her wishes.
Itsy, I can only imagine your pain. And the only advice I can offer, is what I think I would do. This problem occurred over years, as such there is no quick fix.
Respect like trust is slowly built, and I would start working slowly on trying to rebuild it with your children.
Stay or go to your grandchild's birthday?
I know, no power on Earth could stop me. We sacrifice for our children, we always have we always will. Ours is a generational story, you may never have the rapport you want with your children, but you might with your grandchildren.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK