Not sure why I've waited so long to come here

[Snow White]

Welcome over here Snow White. It always seems funny to welcome people over here, because it's not a place where anyone wants to be. What I mean is that we understand. Vent, cry, scream and share with others who understand.

Just to understand better, what is it you want? Do you want your husband home? Marriage counseling?

Hi Ms. Ladbug, I think you are one of my newest fb friends!

I am not sure what I want. I used to want him home. Now I want an end. One way or the other. He has been gone for almost 4 months but I discovered the A at the end of Dec and it was going on for a month that they will admit to prior to that but I would say that it was longer but I have no evidence. It has been almost 8 months that I have been in limbo. I need a change, wither move forward or back.

I do not think my H coming home now would work, he has in the last month(since I think he may have actually lost contact with ow)become very nasty with me, mostly accusing me of cheating on him, hiding things, being sneaky ect. I was "not allowed" to post on here but have decided to take back my life. If he needs to yell he can yell because things werne't getting any better just because I complied.

That is not to say I do not want him home, but I do want him to be the person he used to be before he gets here. Or at least some semblance of a decent human being. I love him. I want our family, but I do not want to be abused and I do not want to be the person of the moment because OW won't talk to him until the next one comes along.

There is a hitch in the whole thing though, DBing the whole GAL thing. It is really rough in my sitch. Everytime I do a GAL activity H goes haywire. It is a bad scene, again dramatically different from the person I used to know.