I think it most likely is tougher for older adolescent kids. However, both my children a couple days ago expressed their desire for their mom to come back. I had to tell them that it is not going to happen. I dont long for my wife anymore, but it is so sad and inconvenient to have a family broken apart.
Guys, Both your kids' lines really hit a nerve with me. I feel sad just reading, I can't imagine how you guys feel. Maybe that is what kept me going .... my daughter....maybe that is what did it for my W also. With superdads like you, I am sure your kids will be ok. J210
Last night talking to my son he said that he is sad because his Mom loves Nick more than she loves him. I asked him why he felt that way and he said it’s because she will go swimming with him and won’t with them (the kids). A side note, the stbx has always hated swimming and will never get into the lake with the kids. I told him that she loves him more and that she always will. I talked to him for a while and tried to reassure him.
I then called her and told her what he said. She was surprised that he said that. She doesn’t think she told him she went swimming with Nick. I said she might want to call him to reassure him. She did call, but even at bedtime he wasn’t convinced.
I continue to be surprised that she hasn’t learned to temper he talks about “all the fun” she has with Nick. It always upsets them and she clearly doesn’t get it.
I am so sorry for what your kids are going through. You have a big load, of course, but you are in a better maturity level to process it all. Your kids just seem to feel they are losing their mom. How sad....
Hugs to my brother. Hope you are building your PMA. Any bike rides or fishing coming up??
I knew you were okay with you. But I figured the kids' pain would make you hurt for them....glad you had a nice trip.
On a positive note, it is good the kids can confide in you, that they trust you enough to share with you. I hope my kids stay open with me as they grow...
Do you think the kids may benefit from some counseling to help them cope with the divorce and the possibility of a step dad in their future?
I remembered you did some dating a while back with a school teacher (after G27). Did you stop contact with her? I ask because I am at about the same point time wise as you in this and have started seeing a new gal. They say to wait 2 years before dating, but I dont feel like I am jumping the gun. I enjoy doing things by myself, but it sure is a lot funner with someone else that relates to you on a personal level.
Kerry, that was the first thing I asked when we met in Canada for... fishing. Prince Charming said the teacher went poof!!!! (For the record : I don't trust fishermen) S
PS. We are dealing with the same issues at home. I know how you feel.
Prince Charming said the teacher went poof!!!! (For the record : I don't trust fishermen)