Trying not to count my chickens!

[Nature Girl]

I asked him what makes him happy...he said he didn't really know and that it changes but he is trying to figure it out. I suggested to him that it is all about perspective and focusing on what you do have rather than what you don't. He told me that he doesn't feel that he has been successful yet in his life. I pointed out his successes...I am not sure he heard me.

Hi Upside!

I think maybe you should try to empathize with what he is telling you rather than offering him suggestions for how to fix himself. Strive to make him think that you really "get" him (even if you don't "get" him).

I know we want to fix them so badly and point out how easy it would be if they just got a different perspective.

I wish I could say that this advice I came up with on my own, but reading your post just reminded me of what my DB coach told me in our first session way back when. - but don't think the status of my situation means that advice didn't "work", I just never really got another chance to put it into play.

Glad to hear your son seems better. That is so scarey!

Give your H some space and find some more patience. It must be so difficult to be so close and yet not close enough AND for it to be so totally outside of your control.