For the Guy with Kids and a WW 8

[karen43]

So, instead of "Gone Baby Gone" on Friday, she's gonna be "Sorta, Kinda, Nearly, Almost Gone Baby Gone".

So I guess my countdown will be slightly extended.

When my H moved out, he came up with some lame excuse and moved out a day or 2 later than he had told me (which just added to my stress level). I do think the fact they don't rush out maybe indicates some confusion or ambivalence on their part? I mean they are basically confused, aren't they? Karen

[hopeful4her]

I mean they are basically confused, aren't they?

You got that right.

I checked my phone tonight. Some missed calls. One from B. No VMs.

I broke down and called her. Just stuff.

I hate that I have to talk to someone else just to talk. To interact. A real person. I mean, I talk to people all damn day. Clients and employees. Friendly enough but not the same. Its nice to just relax and talk. Hear what is going on in someone elses life. Have them interested in what's going on with you. Just a friend, you know. I talk to my best friend, but its different when its guy talk. Talking to her, theres no inuendo, no flirty talk. Just talk about mutual friends, work stuff, movies. Chit chat.

She's a talker. I need someone to engage me. Talk to me.

The kind of stuff I miss with roomie. When we first married, we just talked all the time. She would say the same. Then something happened. We thought we knew everything about each other or something. Or we just talked about the kids. No deep talk anymore.

Thats what happens in an affair. Your talking to each other because your learning about each other. Or at least what you WANT the other person to think about you.....

I think I just hit MYSELF with a 2x4. Boy, I'm one mixed up person.

I just don't know how others do it.

On Sunday, I don't remember how it came up, but I started telling D11 how she is like her mother and I. We were sitting at the bar to the kitchen. Roomie was washing dishes. D11 was whining about something.

"Your just like your mom and me. We don't know how to initiate talking. Your mom is like me and she doesn't realize it. We have to have someone talk to us first and then we can just talk and talk."

Roomie just looked at us. That was or is a complaint about me. Our conversations. Not a lot to them anymore. But we are the same. Initiating conversation. She wanted me to talk to her and I wanted her to talk to me.

What a stupid thing.

[kat727]

I think it is time to bring up Retro. Can't hurt, can it?

kat

[fightingirish]

hopeful...

Sometimes is almost worse when they drag this crap out. Its like "do you want to stay or not, don't make me suffer a slow death, just get it over with if your so he$$ bent on it"

Ok sorry, Just annoys me how someone can be so non-emotional about such a serious thing.

[hopeful4her]

Hey kat. Yes, I keep thinking about an appropriate time, but then, is there really an appropriate time? Just need to do it. Tonight might be the time. We'll see. I'll print out some stuff today and take it home.

'sup, Tal? I wish I had the funds to hire a moving guy to just help her get it done. It would be good for me and for her. I would see that as nice, actually. Roomie would take it as "See, I knew you wanted me out of your hair!"
Funny how they can turn things around on you.

BTW, she did leave my phone at home.



Everyone got back from the store and I guess a really quick work out for S14. They ended up going to Wallymart. Some new dog collars for the two big dogs and one for the one puppy they plan on keeping. She also bought the girls a couple of Barbies. Yes, D11 still likes to play with them. I went to their room to watch them play with their life size barbie town house.

Okay, its not life size, but its pretty dang big. One fourth of a wall space.

D11 is so creative. She always has been. She can think up a story about anything. Sooo dramatic. She is exactly like me. Her English teacher wants to keep her in a creative writing class.

A chip off the old block.

She is so dramatic in her Barbie playing, that D6 becomes so mesmerized that she just stands there holding her Barbie, watching D11's Barbies do their thing. Like she forgets that she is even playing, too. It's the funniest thing you have ever seen! Like watching a play. I'm totally laughing while I'm typing this!

I'm laying on D11 bed and S14 comes in to see the show. He lays on top of me. He gets bored and leaves. I tell the girls its time for bed. Goodnight kisses.

I see roomie fell asleep watching tv again. Fully dressed. I turn off the tv and cover her with a blanket again. Goodnight sweet Princess Diabla. Thats She-devil for .....well, ya'll know.

Funny, I was feeling like George Costanza.

She wakes up, finds tv off, ceiling fan on for her, and covered with a blanket. I did it! No one else! Not the kids! I did it! I'm the nice one! Next time, do I have to accidently poke her in the rib as I'm covering her so she'll know its me?

Okay, that was a funny thought to me

Here something else. I told ya'll that our little dog is in heat again. Theres been a little scotty coming around sniffing and even scratching at the door. I have been throwing a couple rocks at it every morning this whole week, but he's quick. He woke me up at about 4am this morning. He's persistant. And I haven't been able to hit it.

It just dawned on me on the drive in this morning.

I've been doing that same damn thing with roomie and OM for a whole freakin' year!

How funny is that?!

Anyhoooo.

Today, I'm gonna listen to some System of a Down. Toxicity, Hypnotize, and Mesmerize. Their lyrics are whack, but gets you going.

[JeffSTL]

Hey H4H be prepared for the slow move, I come home each day and something else is missing, W moved all the big stuff out in one day now slowly day by day stuff is disapearing, you think you are doing fine, then, a picture is gone or a mixing bowl and you lose it.

Its like a Chinese water torture


M45
W41
M10.75 years
D9, D6, D6, S5
OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me
WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08
W files for D 07/18/08
Date I'll forgive W for A = never

[hopeful4her]

Its like a Chinese water torture

Jeff, I know you didn't intend for this to be funny, but it had me LMAO!!



I hope it isn't dragged out too long. Really no reason for her to be coming back to the house except for something she needs. That would be few and far between. She won't be here watching the kids or anything. I might even change the locks afterwards.

[hopeful4her]

Not much going on today, is there?

This is odd. These are invites that I have gotten from yesterday to today.

B called me yesterday to have a drink after work yesterday for the friend that we were planning on getting together with on Friday. Its her Bday but she decided she didn't want to celebrate it. She decided to have just a couple of drinks yesterday. I missed it, but B was thinking of still doing something. She'll call and let me know.

Today, another good family friend called me to invite me to play some pool and have a couple drinks after work. Today is her last day at her current job and is starting another on Monday. I think I'll go.

Today, another friend called about Friday for the friends Bday. He says that he still wants to get together with me. Invite for drinks at Chili's tomorrow after work.

D texts me(as usual) and also inquires about Bday tomorrow. I tell her its canceled. She tells me about the friend that I did a favor for, still wants to take us out to dinner and drinks. Next week for sure.

Another really good friend called me and invited me to have a drink at Houlihan's tomorrow night. It is HIS last day. He is getting a civil service job on base.

And I still have no idea if roomie is taking off of work tomorrow to start her move or if she is just planning on SLOWLY moving little by little. I will have to ask her tonight what her plan is. All these invites and I might have to be with my kids tomorrow night. I could always get them to mom and dads. We both work on Saturday. That or I just keep enjoying my time that spend with them.

I can always go out some other time. Time missed with my kids, especially right now, is time missed that is important to me.

[fightingirish]

That's good you've got a lot of friends out there, that's important.

Spending time with the kids is always good, but like my good friends say you have to do things for yourself to (I should be practicing what I preach )

I would love to get out by myself... one can only dream.

[hopeful4her]

Well, I ended up going to the grocery store and then home. Roomie was home cooking already. They are making arrangements to give the dogs away. Actually roomie is. She said that she took one to work today for a coworker that was off to pick and see it. She thought it was smaller. She brought it back. D11 is whining about keeping two of them. Roomie tells her it would be up to me, because they would have to keep them here.

Thanks alot.

She is talking to me a little bit more. I keep trying to avoid her, but not ignoring her.

I found out from S14 that she is going to take the day off tomorrow. He is going to help her with what he can. She brought a bunch more boxes home. Not big ones. Medium.

She just took S14 to the movies. D6 went with her.

I hate this. I think I will try to get off early tomorrow and get the girls to grandmas house. That way I don't have to worry about them. I'll get them back for church. After I drop them off, I'll go out with some friends.

Did I mention that I hate this?

I don't feel depressed. Just kind of numb. I pray to God that somehow she feels the same sadness.

But I know better than that.

She's done a few things that she really didn't have to. She gave me a plate to serve myself dinner. She's talking a LITTLE bit more. Before she left to take S14 to the movies, she asked me if I wanted to watch a movie that she was going to return tonight. I said no. D's ate dinner in the living room again. I was eating with S14 in the kitchen on the island. While she served herself, she yells out if any one wants some bread. No answer. She asks S14 and he says yes. She turns to me and asks me, too. I say no, thank you.

I hate noticing all this little crap.

She's just trying to make herself feel better. Probably telling herself that she left on nice terms. And even tried to keep up the house.

Just before I left work, I got a call from a lady that was referred to me from another financial institution. She needs a seperate account. She is getting divorced. She says that her H took their two and a half year old from under her nose through the courts. She is expecting some money to come in to pay for L. Meeting her first thing in the morning. Same age as I.

I forsee us having an interesting conversation tomorrow morning.

I just helped another woman on Tuesday. She got some money from in inheritance. She has been separated for 3 weeks. She left him. Abusive. Two kids. Nine and five.

What is going on? When roomie and I were on better terms, she had told me that she is seeing a lot more divorced couples, too.