Pre-bomb the most positive times, what worked (including sexually), were the times when H felt really secure in my love/acceptance for him, and when circumstances made it so I was not in control, or meek.
This is just my opinion but could you view the meekness as a role play type thing? You said your sex life worked like a dream then. You obviously got something out of that too. It doesn't mean that you have to be that way all the time, your h obviously fell in love with the strong you too. Maybe it is a bit of a control thing for him to as he has this issue that he is not able to control when he is ml.
I would say do more of what works, i.e. the nurturing stuff but I am not sure that it works with where they are just at the moment. But I am jaded by my h and experience there, you would have to judge that one for yourself. It sounds like you have struck a good balance at the moment. I think Real Giving is a form of nurture and you are doing that by letting him go ahead with the divorce proceedings etc.
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He told me this today after he picked me up from work so we could go hang out. I just got really quiet, I wasn't even really sad. This is what he wants, and I can't stop him.
California has a 6 month waiting period to finalize, so the timer is about to be set on me.
Hanging out was kind of somber and serious after that. I was tired from last night, and kind of shocked over his news. But it went well.
Ok, now you've got the horrid stuff out the way and you both now know where you stand I would avoid discussions on it as much as possible. Show him the fun you now, this is the time to show him the strong you, as we know begging and crying and pursuing etc doesn’t work and I view those as weak/ meek things. You don't do these things and her responds well to you. That is where he likes the strong Lost methinks.
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.S. Speaking of not going anywhere, a really gorgeous & sweet guy asked me for my phone number last night at an event I went to. Nothing will come of it, cause of course I'm not going there, but it was nice. Plus I answered the question I posed in my last thread of what I would do if I was also attracted to a guy who was attracted to me, and I guess the answer is feel good & stand.
Way to go foxy lady! You are a star!
P.S - Oh, by the way my ship analogy is from a Beautiful SOuth song but I don't think they migrated across the pond so I dont know where he got his ship analogy...
You are a star!
