Help...I think I did a 180...I hope

[Sophie]

Thank you V-Handsome Jeff...I haven't seen myself as an obstacle until recently. I felt offended by it actually. But, possibly seeing things through H's mind/eyes...might help! It's definately a different view!!

I'm not sure what to do if he comes in 'my' house when he brings the kids home. The kids and I have cake and presents yet to open, we did have the whole day planned....I assume the kids would ask him in.

There is a 'mantra' in my mind....'ACT AS IF....just be nice'. I guess letting go of stuff is part of forgiveness.

He may not mean it this time either...he may have been exerting a power play with me...only to push my buttons. If so, he'll drift away again.

Just to give you a time frame...

Me-50
H-38
Married 15 years 8/7/08
D8
S10
S13
H affair 11/04-7/05
H moved out 4/06
9/1/07 I asked H to either pursue a divorce or find a way to bring the family back together...the limbo land was not working.
9/1/07- today...no contact from him to the kids at all, and he has been for soccer games and special days...only...about 60 different days, for a few hours...