Thanks so much you guys. It's been awhile and nothing to report.
I am still waiting for the other shoe to drop as far as getting our D finalized. I have not heard from my H except for some medical bills he sent in the mail. No note, just sent me the bills in an envelope.
We don't communicate at all, just this wall of ice for the past four months that I just can't figure out how to penetrate. I emailed him in a very neutral way just before Fathers Day; nothing. Silence.
How do I DB at all? I know I said I was "done" before, but I still wrack my brain for something to do that will help. I obviously have been pitch black, no pursuing, and I have not even been back to my C because she is now counseling H and his OW to help them be successful in their new relationship. Nice, huh? They are engaged and H is still married to me.
When is this A going to burn out? When will there be trouble in paradise?
I have given H space, not pursued, never cried or begged, never asked H "why, why, why?", never talked about R, (except to ask if he wanted to to speak with our priest together, but that was way back in February), never talked to his family, nothing.
I now think that DB is wrong about not pursuing. I think I should have asked H "Why?", I should have done SOME pursuing. Now, I can't. And I believe that there is such a thing as too much space. It really does make your H believe that everything is OK and they have nothing to feel guilty about. It simply reinforces their idea that they made the right decision in walking away.
