I was in that dark place where you just don't trust yourself, yet you cycle between thinking that everyone else is wrong at one time and that you need them the next.
Be her most caring friend, right now when she needs you most.
I have to tell you that I think there is MUCH wisdom and good counsel in this.
You know that my take on your situation is guided a great deal by the fact that your wife has NOT taken on many of the truly ugly characteristics that come with some MLC'ers or mean WAS's.
I do believe that your wife is in incredible agony right now. I don't know why Mules, because, if anything, after having gone through my own MLC/divorce experience I tend to be less sympathetic to the one who is causing the problems.
You have a job to do, and God forgive me for reminding you of this, because it's a job that's going to be hard and continue to take much from you.
Your job is to love this woman enough that you endure the pain of what she's going through.
All of these externals involving the kids, you, the in-laws, the neighbors...all of these things are circumstantial to whatever issues are affecting her on the inside, whether they be physiological or emotional in nature.
If she had advancing Alzheimers, I trust that you would be beside her to the end, caring for her, picking up her slack, and seeing that she got the best care imaginable.
Well to me, this is similar, even though you cannot put a name on it just yet.
Your actions towards her during this dark time will have a significant effect on the relationship the two of you have when this issue is finally addressed and solved.
I'm sorry that things will be so hard for you. We can offer you our prayers, our support, and our ears when you just need to get it off your chest or bounce some ideas around. But you have to do the hard work.
Blessings,
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
