Thanks for your thoughts. I don't know how he feels about it being my solution. One of the things with H is that when he is in a bad mood he doesn't want to know about solutions. I know now of course why that is and he just needs emotional support not solutions. However I feel that by conceding to him and then us sleeping on it he was probably in a better mood by the time I came up with my solution. Truth is I felt angry and stepped on by him when I had to give up BOTH my plans before he would calm down. And I would be the person on the phone to people explaining why I was letting them down.
Nik:
Salsa went really well. H confessed afterwards that he was not looking forward to it but he was great and I told him so. In the lessons you have to keep swapping partners so I boosted his ego by telling him which other partners were rubbish and that he was at least as good as any of the others. It was great, dancing with him felt really natural and flowed. I have been so disappointed over the years that he would never dance with me, but I guess I was too critical in the past when we did dance and he just gave up.
I will catch up on your threads soon.
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
