I was looking at an old email I sent to my wife on Oct 24, 2007. This was my first feeble stab at trying to repair our marriage. Email sure is a cold way to communicate with someone that you know intimately. Instead of sitting down face to face with her to express my desire to restore our marriage and make it the best it can be. I sent an email. No wonder nothing happened as a result of that message. The really stupid thing is, if I had sat down with her to tell her this it would have meant so much more to her.

Take this as a lesson, DON'T SEND AN EMAIL for something this important and personal.

Say it... Look into your love's eyes and express your feelings directly to them.

Here's what I sent but should have said:

W,

You and I have shared so many years together now. We have had our ups and downs and had to face many challenges. It seems lately though that we are in the doldrums, instead of enjoying each other and doing fun things together we are just bickering at each other. I know that things can't always be fun, but they don't have to be all bad either. I am mostly to blame for this. Also the money situation right now isn't helping things but hell, when have we ever had enough money not to worry about it?

All I know is that it's just no fun to always be fighting and I feel like we are slipping into an awful rut. I want us to be happy together, but I'm not sure what we need to do to change the path we are on. I have had this on my mind for quite a while now and I don't know if you are thinking the same way or not. When I get depressed about it, I end up disconnecting from the relationship and that just makes things worse. I don't know; maybe we are both disconnected right now. How can we get the connection back?

You know that I love you and that I always will. I really miss your touching, kisses and hugs. I'm just not feeling very loved right now. It's probably mostly my fault and I wish I knew what to do about it. Please let's fix things before it gets any worse than it already is. I am willing to do whatever it takes to have a happy and strong relationship with you. Just let me know what it is that I need to change to make it happen.

Love,
H

Thankfully we got over the money troubles and I finally found the will to change myself and figured out the things to do to make her happy again. We are slowly reconnecting again. \:\)

Cinco