For the Guy with Kids and a WW 8

[hopeful4her]

Thats why I'm here kat. To hear it from all sides. It is hard to see things sometimes. Sometimes we try to hard to "see" things. Things that aren't there, and we have to rely on others to tell us.

I appreciate all views. It most definatly help to have them and to put them into consideration. I'm a firm believer in being honest with someone. It's like I've told roomie. A good friend will empathize with you about something. A true friend will tell you something that you may or may not want to hear.

I think Puppy started a thread on what we would have done different. That question is not fair. It's not fair knowing what the outcome is in advance. The question has to be more like,

"What would you have done different assuming you still did not know the outcome of your sitch and still wanted to achieve the goal of reconciling with your spouse?"

The question gets a lot harder. I think a lot of people were saying how they would have done something totally different.

Kat, I think you would be hard pressed to say that you would have thrown him out the first time he did not want to stop seeing OM. You told me that once. It's too easy knowing that all the crap you endured didn't help.

I know I'm going to tell myself the same thing. I KNOW I will when I get D papers. But I keep thinking to myself. I'm not getting divorced. I'm getting seperated.

Who knows what can happen? Thats my hope talking.

But I agree with this last one,

I truly believe if I had been a bit firmer then instead of being in such shock, it would have made a bit of difference.

I should have been firmer earlier. Not tried to be such a friend. I still don't think I would have thrown her out. Doing the things I now doing but just earlier.

Thats all I can say or do.

Thank you sweet kat. Hugs back to you. I know your having a tough time too. This moving day is throwing me off. But I'm really trying to stay cool about it.

My kids, my kids, my poor kids.