OH, and you can always have a friend or two of yours stay over with you when you move in. She isn't going to bring her OM there if you have someone watching your home while you are at work.
I am SURE yo ucan find someone who won't mind living there with you for a while to keep that house OM free.
Also, having your friends over and some good times there will clean away the smell. You can always sell it later. Right now I would reccomend moving back in with a friend or family member and watching her pack and leave.
Hold off on divorce for now though. There's no hurry. I think the boldest thing you could do would be to stick to your guns on the dbing. But do'nt talk to her. Show her you are hurt by not talking to her.
But I would seriously consider calling social services, I really don' think she's mature enought o parent a child right now. You can always hire a sitter or use day care you don't need your wife to do that. And if you are parentin gthe child, she can't ask for support.
You can ask HER PARENTS to sit in on your son while you are at work too. If HER parents pitch in your wife look look like total crap.
I would right now just be shutting her out. Don't treat her mean, just detach from her totally. I am hoping her parents will rally in your support right now with support when you need it - financial, child care, etc.
She looks like total crap right now, you have been a price for weeks, trust me she just buried her respect from everyone probably at this point.
AND DONT TELL HER YOU ARE MOVING IN...take her parents with you and just WALK IN with your bags. Don't say a damn thing to her.
Someone should be able to house sit for you. Just make sure they never leave her alone if she tries to come by. If she gets someone shadowing her around the house she won't want to stay there no matter how angry she is.
I am not saying give up, I am saying change strategies.
The best thing you can do to keep your sanity and respect from your community is to be the better man and just parent your son. Don't even talk about her.
If they tell you they want to blast her, tell them you would appreciate any support or pressure they are willing to offer. And that she has it coming, but you are her son's father and you aren't the one to be doing the blasting.
I gotta split, I told one of my wife's best friends about her affair. She's known this best friend for twenty years, and we have BOTH known this best friend for over twelve years. Her best friend is really upset...so of course I am the bad guy.
Granted, I should have talked to my wife first, but like you I discovered something upsetting and reacted.
I am not sure if I made the best call here, but now I have to ride the storm out.
Also Buster, very good call on calling the police and not throwing him out yourself..it takes a lot of balls to do that...I don't know if I would have handled it with nearly that amount of strength.
AND DONT TELL HER YOU ARE MOVING IN...take her parents with you and just WALK IN with your bags. Don't say a damn thing to her.
Someone should be able to house sit for you. Just make sure they never leave her alone if she tries to come by. If she gets someone shadowing her around the house she won't want to stay there no matter how angry she is.
I am not saying give up, I am saying change strategies.
we just has a blow up on the tele. Nasty the whole time. Why won't I give her a divorce etc. She tried bargaining. If I give a divorce she won't have him there etc . Kept telling her to listen to how she's talking and acting. She doesn't know why I won't let her go, she loves him etc
2. Your relationship with your wife is over when YOU say it is over ----MarkF
Look, I know the hand you've been dealt SUCKS...Pain has come to pay you a visit, and you have a choice as to what you do with it: let it consume you, or push your way through it...YOU decide you want to do. But we can't make the decision for you.
I already said my piece on that one. My position is don't let it consume you because then you let the OM get the best of you.
Show him for the child he is by being the man.
Divorcing her now would give him a thrill, he would get a big ego boost to learn how upset he has left you.
The worst thing you can do to him is act as if he doesn't matter. THAT will piss him off.
we just has a blow up on the tele. Nasty the whole time. Why won't I give her a divorce etc. She tried bargaining. If I give a divorce she won't have him there etc .
