I am TIRED of having friends and family pestering me about how I'm a schmuck for trying to be amicable with my wife, how I need to immediately sit down with an attorney and file for a D, how I should dump all W's stuff on the doorstep, how I should hire some barracuda to shut my wife out of child custody completely and lock her out of my $$$, etc.
They don't get it.
THEY are part of the problem. Our society's acceptance of marriage as little more than a "choice" that can be dropped when one's perceived personal needs seem more important, its acceptance of shysters slugging it out to besmirch each spouse's reputation, the need for bloody vengeance... my alleged friends and many in my family are part of the frigging problem. I may be stuck with my blood, but I've already dropped every single "friend" who kept urging me to go after W with bloody, Sicilian-style vendetta.
I draw the line when and where it needs drawing (e.g, not letting wife and OM have my three agreed-upon custody days to take kids camping), but W and I have worked damned hard to stay friends. Not only am I DBing my ass of, but my counselor is helping me keep my resentment and anger in check, reminding me that W has done great things for/with me, and reminds me that one of my jobs is to not make life with me less attractive than life with OM. It's damned hard, and I will jettison any 3rd party who makes it harder.
Me: 47 Kids: 2 boys, 14 & 8 Bomb: 5/5/08 Married: 16 years, together 20 Divorce final 8/11/10 I remarried, to an amazing woman: 3/17/12... "Once in awhile, in an ordinary life, love gives us a fairy tale"
