Sounds like you've got a really good attitude, though -- and you've made some great progress in recovering your M. Good work! It isn't easy.
I too cornered my H about his lying -- after reading his email and finding out he was seeing the 0-chick again. He wrote her that all he dreamed of was escaping from me.
I let him ream me for snooping and then I let him go. He moved out. Took my guitar.
It was awful -- geez I was so lonely. It hurt to "lance the boil" -- but now the poisonous lying and cheating and rancor have drained away.
I'm moving on with my life -- we are BOTH single. What he does is no longer my business.
And you know what? It's a relief!
Know what else?
Now that he is free to date that pimply pudge, he misses me.
Freedom. What does he do with it? Calls me, comes over, wants to hang out.
We are starting a new friendship.
Don't know where it will lead. Don't know if I want him back. But there could be hope. Like everybody says, whatever R we have will be a brand new one.
Sounds a little similar thing to your sitch, maybe?
Remember how human nature works, let your W save a little face (she's ashamed already, or she wouldn't hafta hide, right?) -- she'll be grateful for a light touch. Like with dogs -- you don't gotta rub their noses in it.
Hee hee, that's DB-ing for ya -- just plain old dog training in disguise.
It does take a lot of patience.
Oh, it also helps to buy a new guitar (mine's cherry red).
Dude, I'm with ya and I see lots of hope for you guys. Will keep checking in.
