The Wifey - trying hard not to cry.

[Neilh23]

today's plans..

well, i get 2d's in the morning....so we
are currently watching playhouse disney
then we are going to do some finger painting
then take a bath (the W said if i have some time today, a bath would be good...which i'll take to mean Can you bathe them for me today, thanks)
probably to the playground then
then come back for lunch
W will pick up 2d's around noon
i then will go to friends house to paint some of their house
come home, have dinner
read harry potter 7/5LL
work on my paint by number
go to gym
come home from gym, shower
read some more.
go to bed.
start over again. LOL

[The Wifey]

(((Kenny)))

My h read self-help books all the time. So, it could be at some point he will. I'm not holding my breath, though. The books I have are primarily for me.

I got another hug and kiss before he left for work. That is what I will focus on today, not what I found later. Its done and over. Great kiss, too!

[The Wifey]

Neil, make sure you have enough lunch there for the wife to stay and eat. If you already have it made it won't be any trouble for her to stay. Make it easy and make something she likes.

When you are done at the gym you should go somewhere, and not just go home. Go to the library or a park, or something. I know I go down in the dumps if I just sit at home.

Anticipate the downs and try to interrupt them. Go buy an ice cream, or go to a store and browse around. Save the reading for close to bedtime. Go out and do something.

[Neilh23]

Kjo-
she never joins us for lunch. altho, i have asked her to. at the moment she isn't too keen on doing stuff togther with the kids....i'm not sure as to why

[Shelby]

Kelly Jo,
Thank You for visiting my thread. I just finished reading this one. Man, we sure have a lot of similarities and are going through alot of the same things.
My husband also still says that he loves me and understands how that is hard for me to understand how he could want a separation.

My Husband also told me he always wants to be a part of my life, he would like to remain best friends if we were to separate/divorce. I don't think I could handle that though.

We are also still living together. He has mentioned he would like to find a place for himself to move into, but so far he is still living here and we are sharing a bed, although he will not touch me.

I also feel as though We are living in limbo land. I guess that is better than him moving out. I don't know.

Unfortunately I don't have a lot of advice to give right now, I feel as though I am too caught up in my own sitch and have so much more to learn myself before I can start giving anyone else advice. I just wanted you to know you are not alone in this. I understand all that you are going through. Our bombs were only 1 week apart.

Thanks again for your visit, Shelby

[ndsmhelp]

Hey Wifey
Just stopped in to see how everyone was doing this morning. Funny, I went to your thread before I went to my own...there is always so much activity. Don't have time to catch up on everything this morning. Heading out soon to do a little shopping then coming back to get some work done on the house. I know you are still having a hard time with all of this, but I think as I read your posts, you "sound" better.

NDS

My husband also still says that he loves me and understands how that is hard for me to understand how he could want a separation.

My Husband also told me he always wants to be a part of my life, he would like to remain best friends if we were to separate/divorce. I don't think I could handle that though.

We are also still living together. He has mentioned he would like to find a place for himself to move into, but so far he is still living here and we are sharing a bed, although he will not touch me.

I also feel as though We are living in limbo land. I guess that is better than him moving out. I don't know.

Shelby
My wife and I have had that exact conversation, and I feel exactly the same way.

[The Wifey]

Well, I do feel better. I feel good, although drained a bit.

((Shelby)) The thing is my husband will touch me. He is confused as all get out, but he will. I know he loves me and it comes through loud and clear some times. Other times he's like a frightened rabbit that has to run and hide.

Wow, only a week difference between our bombs. We are in this together, then.

We are going to be ok. This isn't an ending. This is a new beginning. Starting today, we are going to be ourselves (Whoever ourselves might be.) : )

[pisces9]

hi KJ- i would read DR as many times as you can..ive read it and underlined it so many times and i still learn so much each time...it is like my marriage bible...DB wasnt as clear cut for me with guidelines...

also a book for your sitch is called getting back together...it talks about sep and being back together and has some homework or worksheet stuff....very hopeful and helpful!

you are so lucky and you are doing great....im sure its hard too

[Virtually_Handsome]

(((((Kelly Jo)))))

I think you just said something that will help you get through this.

Other times he's like a frightened rabbit that has to run and hide.

I think this is a great way to think of it! (Ask Ali, though I think we may use a hedgehog with her.) When you think of it like that, you realize that it is going to take time, and that you have to let him come to you. And, he'll get skittish and back off, just when you think he's made it.

You sound way better today! I'm glad.

[mulesqb]

Hey KJ - Great to see that you are feeling better. I just wanted to point out a post that I got from bworl on my thread last thursday. It was about me focusing too much on the negatives of the sitch and not the positives or the non-negatives. It helped me a lot.

In your sitch - One thing I would focus on is that he is still telling you he loves you and is still touching you and kissing you. I can tell you from my point of view - I would kill to have my W doing one or both of those right now. Those are some great positives to focus on for now. Other than that - was just checking in. Hope you are well - keep it up - you sound great!