The Wifey - trying hard not to cry.

[The Wifey]

What is your plan today? I hope everyone makes a plan every morning. It is the only thing that will help us cope.

That was the word my counselor used, coping. In my situation, she sees me being in limbo, because my husband wants his space at times, but he also has times when he wants to be with me and hug and cuddle and spend time.

We talked a lot about reading him when he comes home and what he needs at any particular time. I want to know when he wants me close and be able to divert myself when he needs the space. Partly I need to keep busy and not just be waiting around, of course GAL. Yet she can see how he needs me to be there when he feels he needs closeness.

Interesting that she picked that up in telling her about our times together. Its what I see and feel also. He wants space, but at other times he needs to know I'm there.

For a long time he could only count on me being busy and not being there most of the time. That is what I learned and am trying to change.

At the same time I am looking to be stronger and better able to cope. I really have no reason to be so afraid all the time. I can be ok and not afraid. Its very empowering to know that alone isn't such a bad place.

This weekend, I think I'm going to go camping again. It will be at the same camp where my mom & dad and sister & bil are at. Still, it will be camping. Yes, that is exactly what I'm going to do.