I think the reason you're not mad yet is, grief comes in stages. You're not to the anger yet. I think you will, in time, maybe. We all deal with things differently. It's okay to feel however you want. It's totally okay to hate the OW, & still love your H. or vice versa.
You are a beautiful amazing giving woman.
Hugs
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
