Slow and steady wins the race... hopefully!

[iamlost]

JCJ, you know our situations are very similar, so I thought I'd comment, too:

I know, not a great way to act but I thought the tough approach would be the best one – a kick up the you know what!

Me, too with my H, but "tough love" always backfired on me. I think the harder I pushed, the more my H retreated. It became about defying me, rather than getting better.

This was a really critical appointment as otherwise all the ops and everything beforehand would have been wasted if they hadn’t cut out all the diseased bits and to make sure the iliostomy had healed as it should.

I just googled ileostomy to figure out what it was! Was his temporary or permanent?

It is like he is ignoring it. He is left with some residual side effects from the operations that he has to live with and that must be hard and embarrassing for him...The thing is he doesn't seem depressed, he just blanks it out.

Does he feel like the ileostomy has "cured" him, or is it straight-up denial?