I do have a question for everyone on here. My W is going to be in town this next week until Thursday night (that's her b-day). Should I invite her to dinner or lunch earlier on in the week? I'm thinking about doing that but I don't know if I should. I got her a simple card and put together a photo slideshow DVD to her favorite music for her. I'm hoping that will seem very personable and shows her that I still care a lot about her.
I have a feeling your W will have other plans. Knowing the stitch as it is, I would advise you not to treat her as you would if she was still in the house with you and not having an affair. If by chance, something was to happen that threw the two of you together.....say, she did drop in to say hello, you could have a simple...none muchy....birthday card....nothing more. Just have it on hand, in case. But, if she doesn't go to you....do not give her anything. I understand that you are trying to show her you care. This is not the route to go at this time. She needs to miss being with you on her birthday. So, don't make it like "old times" if she comes by. If she comes by, just tell her that you had seen the BD cards and thought of her birthday coming up, so you picked it up.....then hand it over. Nothing sappy. Keep it simple and upbeat. No birtday hugs or kisses. If she tries to give you one....you let her, but you pull away first.
Don't act disappointed if she has other plans, etc. But don't call her or anything. Let her lead the way.
I want to talk to you more about your stitch, but it is getting late, so I'll check back later. Stay strong, and show her a strong man.....no puppy dog eyes, following her around like you are love sick. Outshine the other man! But we will talk about that later, okay?
Take care, Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
