so we all seem to agree on one thing at least I lack tact and diplomacy when I post to others. perhaps it is the passion behind my words that gets lost in the translation. I dont want to analyze this to death. I just see so much hurt and pain and for some the choices seem so obvious from an outsider. some of the threads here are people so stuck just like a deer in the headlights. they are afraid to move forwards just in case they miss out on a chance to make their marriage ok again. they are scared to death to actually take a chance to pursue their own hapiness and do something for themselves.i know what I did to my own family and i know the remorse i feel and felt when I was welcomed back home. at times it feels like it was a dream like nothing ever really happened and things at home are exactly where they should be. at other times it feels like I shouldnt have been one of the lucky ones who had a family praying for me to come to my senses considering how much I dissapointed them all. but in my own defense there are some things I still knew were wrong and knew that I couldnt cross the line. so i know that even in the very dark times God was still protecting me from hitting the point of no return. I saw a show on TV recently and it was about a Man who had survived a terrible accident. he was the only survivor and instead of being grateful that God spared his life he had guilt and anger and shame. He felt as though there were so many who had died who had families that needed them and should have been chosen to live instead of him.I think that is how I feel when I come to these boards to post.
