apparanetly, I'm also doing a crappy job as Dad

[redhottie]

Hi (((Dan))) Just catching up.

Remember, only Dan can say when Dan has had enough. I am glad to see you are seeing a C, and I think that will help to solidify things in your mind.

The anger is normal, and I think sometimes necessary. I have had dreams about beating the SH*T out of my H, and anyone else getting in the way. Somehow, the anger cleans your soul, and makes it easier to handle everything else. You know this is not your fault.

Now is the time to find you. You seem to be doing a great job of that, but you will be a better person regardless of the outcome of the sitch. You have been working hard.

If you think there is nothing left you can do to save the M, then it is time. But do not make any snap decisions, and be 100% sure before you do anything. It really will depend on what you want.

I have a friend who posed this question: do you want to be with your W because you believe if you aren't, you have failed, or because you think it is the right thing to do, or do you want your M because you truly are in love with your W?

Just something to think about...

Lola

Very well said Lola. I was going to say the same thing Dan, you are the only one who will know when you are done. If you are asking yourself that question, then I don't think you are done yet. You do need to stop the snooping though. I did the snooping thing too and all it did was piss off H. I am proud to say that I haven't looked at his cell phone usage in months, not even interested in what it would show.

I understand if you are tired of working on your M. So stop and work on you and your kids. Make changes to that part of your life first. Who knows, W may notice and realize what she is missing out on.