Hi Ken, how you doing now? Just a quick reply to this statement you made.

Quote:
When she first tried to throw me out, her biggest complaint was I didn't help her around the house and with the kids as much as she needed. I immediately changed that and started to do everything...lol. Pendulum swung too far over. This bothered her, (new hoop) so I backed off to a happy medium.

Then she complained I wasn't being patient enough. Changed that. Then it was I was obsessing over fixing marriage (new hoop) Put all the books into a box and into garage. Then it was something else (new hoop). Changed that. Then something else, etc... A constantly moving target.

I did realize these she was actually showing me the things I needed to change in order for her to be happier. These 'complaints' are actually my answer on the things I need to work on. When I started to REALLY pay attention to what she was saying to me, I saw there were diamonds in there that I needed to pluck out.


If you can see the diamond that need to be plucked out....that is all fine and good, but don't become a doormat in trying to make her happy. Nobody can make another person happy. In other words, our happiness cannot depend on another person. We must choose to be happy. I'm not telling you to not try to please her in some of the things you were doing......but if you aren't careful, you will feel like you are doing a circus act and she still will find something wrong. Don't do anything that you feel is demeaning. I don't like to see women use their H's like they are a puppet on a string she is pulling.

So, look for the diamonds that are there and go after that rather than jumping through all the hoops.

You are doing good. Proud of you. Keep up the good work.

Sandi

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!