I think that you should find a counselor and start going to show her that you are no longer lazy when it comes to healing the relationship and that you are serious about the changes you want to make. Just start going yourself, then she may be able to join you.
It sounds like she really loves you but you guys couldn't get along and you were to lazy to get counseling.
I think going dark would be the wrong thing here it's showing more of the same-doing nothing and hoping things will just get better on their own.
