I am with cookie. Italian, 38, never married? Keep him for "limited use only". Italians are so good with words but so poor with actions (sorry guys with Italian origin).
Hey, even if your H IS hurting, there is a shift because you "shifted". So, don't you dare let him suck you in drama again... Continue with what you are doing "taking care of you" (with limited help from external sources-wouldn't hurt)... Love K