All you need right now is baby step and that baby step is finding supporting people and be healthy. After you accomplish that, then you can think next baby step!
Go to your friends house and talk and enjoy time. It won't solve your sitch but it'll help your emotion to calm a little bit and that's big baby step. Don't afraid to ask help or support from outside. You need as much as support! Don't give up and try to find all over the place! Maybe you might not notice my enlish but I'm not native and English is my second language. I still have hard time to understand people over the phone but I had to call and call to find support group. Keep trying! You Will find baby hope somewhere!
