Her friends don't have to tell her what to do in order to be supportive of you.
They can shut the OM out. Tell her he's not welcome in their home. They can refuse to talk to her. They can do a million things without pushing her around.
I think she's hanging around some very ignorant people. That's a shame.
This couple can tell her they would be happier to see you two together.
There's a million things they can do and say without telling her to DO THIS NOW.
If you want something to say to her, if you THINK she's not going to be pushed away by it :
"Our pastor feels sad for us, he thinks we should be talking to him or a counsellor rather than hurrying paperwork right now. He thinks we could both benefit by talking to him a bit to work out how we feel about everything. He wants to help us through this so we both feel our best and our family is unharmed when this is resolved."
"I have spoken to him and he did me a world of good"
"He said you are welcome to contact him at any time day or night"
You need to realise Buster that she isn't likely to take this as a positive, you Really need to be careful with this one.
But I honestly don't think she's going to talk to YOU about any of this right now. She needs exposure to someone who is marriage-friendly that she trusts and respects who has the talent to ease her into a safer place with you.
But if she's pushed too hard, it could set you back months.
If you want to gamble and try something you can try to get her to talk to someone sensible, but I honeslty think she's not ready.
