As I was driving home part of me was anxious about seeing him or if he'd come into the house. I imagined all sorts of standoffs, or being calm cool and collected.
Finally I started affirmations.. "I will not live his anger." I will not be a reflection of his anger.
Now I realize he doesn't give a crap. What I whirl in my head is my own making. I have to remember to live my own life. If they aren't back by my deadline, I'll leave. Don't want my fear of him going through the house to paralyze me.
I'm just amazed at how much I don't trust him.. or maybe secretly hope that he'd invade.. that even negative attention is attention (the modus operandi of our relationship). Argghhh.. toooo much.. suuuuugarrrrrrrrrrrrr!
