I am proud of you for not just sitting around and waiting for him to come to you but looking into what was wrong and realising what needs to be fixed. I bet you are eager to "fix" things and it seems you are getting your chance. Sex can be a very cruicial "bond" between a couple and as a friend of mine used to tell me, "sometimes it all comes down to sex" and often people overlook what those special moments actually mean. For me -and I personally had a few issues with it- making love can be the ultimate proof of "letting go" and surrender yourself to your spouse/bf. And even it is fun, it takes some courage to just let go... Love K
H called today again,no R talk, speaking mostly about his new job. Calls me by my pet name all the time. No ILYs. Then again, ILY was always a treat from him, L is not a word he would use lightly. I'm trying not to analize everything he does or says, but he seems to be a bit apathetic. I needed an official letter from him (concerning our insurance here)and he faxed it to me today, his signature missing. He said, he will send another fax tomorrow. His mind is elsewhere and his emotions seem to be on hold. I don't know what to make of it, whether it's a good or a bad sign.
Keeping still
I ask not for a lighter burden, but for broader shoulders ____________________________________________________ M 46 H 45 D 17 M/T 23 Bomb #1 (ILYBNILWY) 12.06 Bomb #2 (OW) 12.07 Bomb #3 (chose OW over M) 9.08
I'm trying not to analize everything he does or says, but he seems to be a bit apathetic.
The fog may not have completely cleared and he may be feeling overwhelmed with having ended OR. This may come across as him being apathetic. You're doing the right thing by keeping still.
HUGS!!!
Me47 H46 S13 M16 Piecing since May/09
"Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it." Lou Holtz
Nothing wise to add, just wanted to drop by and say hi with a few hugs!
Oh, and as for you getting a chuckle out of my heathen children and the blueberries----PPPTTTHHHBBBTTTT since we cannot have a raspberry smiley in the threads!! LOL
SMW
M40/H36 T16/M14 4K B2/08 S4/08 current
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. I Corinthians 13:7
Thank you again, dear ((((friends))) for checking in on me! You give me courage to stand and be patient every time I need it.
I had a phone call today which unnerved me. A friend of mine (and H's), the one who sent the e-mail other day, has called me today. Basically she was telling me that I should GAL and take care of myself and concentrate on my and D's needs ( :)!) and let this idiot of a H of mine (she'd NEVER refer to him as an idiot before!)sort out his own sh!t. I've told her, thanks, but I believe he's done it already. She said, she doesn't think so.Turned out, H was in her house on her H's birthday, drank only water there. When somebody asked him, if he'd have a glass of wine, his respond was: no, I'm not going to drink now, not until I sort out my personal life. Which is what my F has thought of as a remark, showing that OW is still there and his personal life is still not sorted out. I don't read too much into what he said, but I'm thinking now, whether my F has told me everything. She sounded really MAD at him, and she said she has discussed our sitch with her H, and they both are of the same opinion (that I should take care of ME, etc). It was a well meant call, but it sent me head first back into panick mode!
It's getting increasingly difficult to sit tight :)!
Oh, I forgot something. Yesterday, when H called, I asked him when he's planning to come over (remember, at one point he said if he had money, he'd try to come earlier, Well, he has it now). He said: on 20th (the original date). And right away, before I had time to reply, he said: only because of my new job, you know, it's important for me to be here now, as they start a new project. I said, of course, sure, feeling disappointed but not letting it show. I was glad, though, he felt like explaining it to me.
I ask not for a lighter burden, but for broader shoulders ____________________________________________________ M 46 H 45 D 17 M/T 23 Bomb #1 (ILYBNILWY) 12.06 Bomb #2 (OW) 12.07 Bomb #3 (chose OW over M) 9.08
I can't really tell what your friend's call was all about. Maybe there is "a delay" in things? Like things have progressed and because your friends do not know that, translate incidents from another POV?
Not much you can do anyway, you should be able to voice some of your concerns at a point but you know best when that should be...
Keep walking Stellitsa mou (why don't you join us in the alternate universe, do you have Jen's email?) Love K
