I had to remind myself over and over that the life and "love" with the OM was fantasylike and thus made it something it really wasn't. Reading books helped a lot, too, like the book After the Affair. This is NOT because you were less loveable, or because he loved you less. Remind yourself that over and over. It was a different love that was not a real love. Time and patience. I know this must be very hard.
