Quote: How do you resolve that stuff? Talking with him at this point, even in MC, is just a replay of the same nonsense.
I think that's the biggest problem - the one person who we hope can help us resolve it, answer the questions, etc. CAN'T help. They can give some answers, but nothing that's going to make us go "Ohhh that's why you're tearing our family apart."
This is absolutely on the mark. In the aftermath of betrayal, it seems like the answers can only come from the person who is screwing everything up...but reality is that life doesn't always hand you answers tied up in neat little packages.
At one point soon after the bomb, my H said to me: "A lot of this you are going to have to work out on your own." At the time it felt like a huge slap in the face...but it was true. Apologies, answers, etc. seem like a panacea until they come, and then you wonder if you really heard them or if you can trust them. Either way, you're pretty much on your own--well, not entirely. It's you and God. He'll hold your hand, comfort you, walk with you, carry you when you can't walk any further, and after some time learning how to detach, relax and leave it in His hands, you'll realize that you're okay. (((Hugs))
