Another one joins the flock (Part II)

[Mike85]

Jack:

You're right about my attitude changing re my sons after the bomb. Yes, they are a bigger priority for me for several reasons, not the least of which is that I only have them for half the week. I'm also worried about how our situation is impacting them. I would have thought that these issues would also have crossed my wife's mind, since she's in the same boat (granted, she's the one who put us there...).

Yes, I've been told not to attack the OM - from what I've read, by my counselor, etc. I don't attack him directly, don't attack him to wife. don't attack him to the kids. I've been diligent about following that line. I refuse to defend him however, to other adults who happen to bring him up. The objective fact is that he is not a good person based upon what he is doing. Period. I won't engage in attacks (as fun as that would be) but I sure as hell am not going to make him out to be some great Joe who mistakenly found himself with a woman who just happened to be married.

I appreciate your advice about not coddling my boys, but under the circumstances, I still believe my decision was warranted. Oldest son had, up to that point, seemed surprisingly well-adjusted and almost chipper (even his pediatrician and therapist said so and were almost waiting for the other shoe to drop). He expressed his feelings in a way that I valued and saw literally no point in forcing him to get dressed and spend pretty much the entire day away from his home every day this week when he felt the way he did. Until such time as he discusses his issues with his therapist on Saturday, I'm going to follow my instincts for now. He doesn't need another parent who seemingly wants to shuffle him off.

Besides, it has poured every single day this week, and one of the scout moms told me that the kids were miserable, cold, and wet.

Scout camp happens every year, and besides, he's still doing soccer camp twice a week.