Well, the talk Sat never happened. Not a big surprise for me, and kinda a relief. Last night, h called me as I was picking up the kids and asked me to bring the kids to him while I go to weight watchers. My mom always watches the kids Tues while I'm at ww, but h lately has been on this kick that he wants to start seeing the kids more. (I know that's a GOOD thing, but it's irritating me that for 8mos he never wanted to see them until now). Anyway, I don't know what h thought ww was, but it's only a 30min meeting. After ww, I always drive-thru Taco Bell ( yes, I count it into my points for the day). So, I show up about 35 min later with my Taco Bell, and I sit at the table and start to eat while the kids finish playing. H then calls me to the couch and tells me that they just got done BBQ'ing chicken and hot dogs and he wants to eat with the kids. I said, "Great", and I started to put my food away thinking that BBQ sounded wonderful. Then he tells me, "So, can you leave while I eat with the kids?" Leave?? He tells me all day about how he wants to work on things with me, and then he asks me to leave so he can eat with the kids?!
I was so humiliated that I had to sit in my car in front of his house eating my Taco Bell while he and my kids, and the in-laws sat together eating BBQ! Finally, about 45 min later, I was able to take the kids home. I didn't even look at h as I put them in the car.
He calls later, and says, "are you going to work on the marriage, or should I just file for divorce?" me: Was that your idea of working on the marriage? Making your wife eat dinner in the car? h: just answer my question. me: I've never felt so unloved and disrespected as I did tonight. h: Fine. I'll go file, and you can go f*** yourself!
I know he's pushing my buttons so he can justify his decisions about moving away from his family. His going tomorrow to look at houses in Santa Maria and I KNOW he wants to move there. It would look really bad if he left us behind unless I'm some evil, manipulating, b*tch. On the other hand, he calls me later and says he wants to work on the marriage, and he wants me prove that I'll work on things with him by moving with him! WE DON'T LIVE TOGETHER NOW, HOW CAN I MOVE AWAY WITH HIM???!!! He doesn't get it. I told him to sit still, work on our marriage and I'll go wherever he wants. He says that's now how it works.
Me 36 Husband 35 D5 S2 separated: 10/29/07-present Served divorce papers 1/22/09 "When the world gives out beneath your feet, it is time to learn how to fly."
