about Ph2's comment - I liked the gist of it, except I have to differ with the last part: the only words that count from her are "I'm sorry. I never should have left. yada yada". I'm not so sure you should count on that. If you read the DR book, it does mention that their return is not always accompanied by this kind of talk. It doesn't mean they don't believe it. I guess what I am saying is, don't let Pride get in the way of reconciliation. Like I said, I agree with the sentiment that she has to win you back. There is such a thing as being too hard-to-get.
Maybe not in those exact words, but it's got to be better than "baby-steps". Accepting half-assed overtures for "possible" reconciliation basically says how desperate you are. By this point in the game, it's fair to expect quite a bit more. I'd say that RTL is a long ways from "being too hard-to-get". But we each decide how much faith we are willing to put in a spouse that walked away and had an affair. For me, I expected nothing less than complete commitment; fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me. Others are willing to settle for less in hopes that actual commitment will grow and that's fine. I've been there, done that, got the tee-shirt, so I'm only coming from my own perspective.
You cannot be lonely if you like the person you're alone with. Dr. Wayne Dyer
